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I really need to post more often, moreso for myself than anything else. I very much need to get into the habit of writing out my feelings, mainly because i dont know how to reach out to talk to anyone i know about how i feel, and that the days have been blurring together so i often forget any feelings ive had. Also this is pretty much the only space i feel safe talking about things. But alas even writing here is hard for me because translating how i feel into words is quite difficult. Anyways, ill try to write more because with experience comes knowledge and ill get better with time.
On the topic of journaling ive also been thinking about maybe starting a video journal. It would be more interesting to look back at than writing i would think. If i did start one it would go on my website (which is very bare bones right now [aka there practically isint a website at all]) which is a bit of a scary thought because for some reason that feels much more public than this. I could just keep it on a hidden page though. Anyways i think starting with a video journal and then easing into an actual written journal would be much easier for me. Mostly because its easy for me to let my thoughts flow out when im talking to myself because my mind hasnt been able to hold onto much thought lately. When i write i often find myself moving onto different topics in my head before i can get all my thoughts written out and it makes it difficult for me to structure what im saying correctly. We'll see if i end up starting the video journal, i dont follow through with most of my hobbies :/.
Besides all that life has been pretty eh lately. I got in a wreck two weeks ago (it feels like 3 days ago) and i messed up my arm and havent been able to work. My car got totaled which has SUCKED, i miss driving around freely T-T. I also ended up having a mental breakdown the night after my wreck, I had a lot of stress from other things that i was ignoring and the wreck just made everything come down on me at once. I was doing really bad for a week or so (from what i can remember anyway) but lately ive just been feeling numb. Well, more complicated than just 'numb' but im not really sure how to explain. But I go on vacation in 3 days and im looking forward to it! I cant really bring myself to be excited but i know that im gonna have a great time when it starts, im going to florida with some family and one of my friends. It'll be good for me to go, i cant help but feel anything but peace when im on the beach.
On the topic of journaling ive also been thinking about maybe starting a video journal. It would be more interesting to look back at than writing i would think. If i did start one it would go on my website (which is very bare bones right now [aka there practically isint a website at all]) which is a bit of a scary thought because for some reason that feels much more public than this. I could just keep it on a hidden page though. Anyways i think starting with a video journal and then easing into an actual written journal would be much easier for me. Mostly because its easy for me to let my thoughts flow out when im talking to myself because my mind hasnt been able to hold onto much thought lately. When i write i often find myself moving onto different topics in my head before i can get all my thoughts written out and it makes it difficult for me to structure what im saying correctly. We'll see if i end up starting the video journal, i dont follow through with most of my hobbies :/.
Besides all that life has been pretty eh lately. I got in a wreck two weeks ago (it feels like 3 days ago) and i messed up my arm and havent been able to work. My car got totaled which has SUCKED, i miss driving around freely T-T. I also ended up having a mental breakdown the night after my wreck, I had a lot of stress from other things that i was ignoring and the wreck just made everything come down on me at once. I was doing really bad for a week or so (from what i can remember anyway) but lately ive just been feeling numb. Well, more complicated than just 'numb' but im not really sure how to explain. But I go on vacation in 3 days and im looking forward to it! I cant really bring myself to be excited but i know that im gonna have a great time when it starts, im going to florida with some family and one of my friends. It'll be good for me to go, i cant help but feel anything but peace when im on the beach.